Well, all was well the first few days of school, until............NOW!
Im certain there just has to be some of my blog readers out there that can give me some advice on what to do when your child doesn't like school? I know most of you either just have a new kindergartener or else will be sending one off to school shortly, but for those of you who have already had a 1st grader or are going thru this same ordeal...please share your advice and wisdom on what to do when your child doesn't enjoy school.
For the past week Elijah has been crying every morning before school, and in fact cried all the way to school today, saying " I don't want to go, I don't have any friends, and its to long of a day". Of course Id love to just say "ok sweetie, you don't have to go anymore, lets go home and play all day". But thats not the case. School is a must. I have tried treats, kind words as in: you will get some friends soon, or school will get better each day, or mommy and caden will be glad when you come home from school happy that you went, or mommy and caden will pray for you, or you can do it son..keep up the good work. Its just that these words of affirmation aren't helping any right now. I was wondering if any of you mom's out there have any suggestions on how to make your son's experience in school a good one?? Id love to have some help here....PLEASE!!!!
8 comments:
Sandra,
I'm not sure how big the school is that Elijah's goes to, but do you know any of his classmates? I was just looking through my class reunion book that I just received, and saw that one of my classmates lives in Knoxville, TN. Jason and his wife have two sons, Cade Gold (6 years old), and Carson Gold (3 years old). I thought of you when I saw that, since they were the same ages as Elijah and Caden.
Jodi
Sandra,
My sister's little boy, Cole, now 6 was the the same way. He would bawl the whole way there and beg not to go. I know it was so hard on her.
The good news is - a year later they have persevered and he now LOVES it.
I'm sure she'd be glad to email/talk to you about it. If I remember, I know one of things they would do is a reward system - if he was able to go to school without crying (I don't know if there was a certain number of days - I don't think in the beginning), he was able to pick a prize out of a chest of prizes (think dollar store). It got to be kind of confidence booster for himself - he'd be so proud of himself when he was "brave and didn't cry".
The only other thing is - not that you wouldn't be - but be proactive in finding out about the environment. SOmetimes there is another child who could be creating stress or something too.
Hang in there - I can remember how hard it was for my sister. The neat thing is she was just saying the other week how rewarding it is seeing him now and being thankful they persevered!
Awww...Sandra, I don't really know anything about it as a disclaimer. If it's truly a issue of not knowing anyone yet, maybe you could invite a classamte over you think he would jive with so he could be with them outside the school setting and form a friendship. All the kiddos are probably adjusting to school and not acting real "I want to be your friend" right now I would think.
Sometimes it helps kids to share a time when you where really scared, something they can relate to so they don't feel alone and know that you understand how they are feeling. Kids have a strong need to be understood.
I'm sure it's hard seeing him so sad in the morning. I hope you're feeling well too with the little baby on the way. =o)
Ann
Andria
Well I don't have any experience in this area, Kels has always loved school. (there was a short period in 2nd grade where she didn't want to everyday because it was such 'hard work') I'm sure this is so hard on you!!! I will be praying for you & Elijah! All I can suggest is pray with him every morning before he goes, and give him something to look forward to when he gets home?!? (reward system, special treat?!?) Cheryl has had trouble with Collin I know, but hang in there...it gets better!! (I know that is FAR from comforting, now!)
thank you for all your advice. I will continue to pray with him before school as he seems to like that. This morning I got up extra early and made french toast if he promised to not cry. He did great this morning. I will continue to do the award system after school as well. This morning I asked Elijah this simple question..." so elijah, if you get into trouble for talking in school...who are you talking to". He replys "my friends" :) To which I said "well isn't that great news, you do have friends"...and elijah smurked. So I think he is maybe realizing its not all that bad. I know this is only one day since I posted for help, but for all you who have said a prayer on our behalf...THANKS...this could be a turn around point. I pick elijah up in an hour and we shall see how he says his day was:)
oh and jodi his school is pretty small which Im thankful for, and those names aren't sounding familiar.
If you know any of his classmates or could know them, I'd ask Elijah if there is 1 or 2 he'd want to have come over after school or on Saturday. Sometimes kids just need a chance to bond with their classmates to feel more connected to them. Doing a fun special activity with them can also improve this. (It's at least one thing that I remember my mom and dad doing during my childhood).
I'll pray -- that's all I can suggest. God will help you through it Sandra!!
Sure don't have any experience in this area, or advice, but will sure be praying, sounds like you got quite a bit of advice, maybe it's just a short-lived "problem" that will soon be a distant memory.
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